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These are the shows and movies your favorite Gilmore Girls characters would watch in 2022 📺
Who's watching what, and who's paying for all those streaming services
Last week, we discussed the perils of binge-watching culture. This week, we’re getting into an equally deep and meaningful topic: what some of our favorite TV characters would be watching in the year 2022. As our flagship Slate and the show that started the career of Remarkist founder John Cabrera, Gilmore Girls holds a special place in our hearts, and we love to think Stars Hollow’s citizenry would be ready to join us on the couch for a watch party, as the real-life actors who portrayed them often do.
Here are just a few of our favorite Gilmore Girls characters and what we think they’d be watching:
Keeps up with Stranger Things and Squid Game to churn out inane trend pieces for BuzzFeed. 💻 Favorite show is Derry Girls. 🙏 Does not pay for anything ever.
Was initially put off by the “inaccuracies” of Bridgerton. 🫖 Cannot stop marveling over Regé-Jean Page and Jonathan Bailey. Pays for every streaming service but forgot the logins for everything except Netflix.
Watched Aliné, the unauthorized Céline Dion biopic 🚢, to point out the inaccuracies. Simultaneously thrilled and annoyed by the 2020s Celine hype train since he was “always a fan.” Pays for Paramount+ and Hulu.
Only watches true crime documentaries. Actively trying to solve The Staircase. 🦉 Has the money but illegally downloads because cord cutting is a “scam.”
Sookie St. James
Too busy to watch TV. Starred in an episode of Selena + Chef. 👩🍳 Selena Gomez cried.
Only watches Marvel movies. 🦸 And old BattleBots tapes. 🤖 Pays for Disney+.
Prefers podcasts to TV. 🎧
Went on a date with a 19-year-old Stranger Things cast member just to get Rory’s attention. 🍝 Pays for Rory to have every streaming service known to man and alien.
Enjoyed A League of Their Own. ⚾ Did not understand that it was about lesbians, but became an ally nonetheless. Pays for Lorelai to have every streaming service known to man and alien but mostly just watches cable.
Favorite new movie is David Byrne’s American Utopia. 🧥 Pays for HBO Max and Netflix.
Zack Van Gerbig
Mostly just plays video games 🎮 instead of watching TV. Refuses to acknowledge that he enjoyed the Bee Gees documentary. Mooches off Lane.
Loved television so much, considered inventing an app for watch parties. 🌽 Forgot the idea and went back to playing video games with Zach. Mooches off Zach, who mooches off Lane.
Watched The French Dispatch at Lulu’s insistence. 📰 Invested his entire life savings in Quibi.
Watched Sonic the Hedgehog 2 at Kirk’s insistence. 🦔 Pays for Hulu because it rhymes with Lulu. Does not know Kirk is no longer a self-made quarter millionaire.
Babette Dell and “Miss Patty” LaCosta
Binge-watching Bridgerton 🫖 with Emily, who has asked them not to tell Lorelai. Broads only pay in song and dance.
Does not own a television. ❓❓❓
(Doesn’t have a last name, apparently) Recently jumped onto the Formula 1 hype train that has possessed America for some reason. 🏎️ Pays for ESPN+. Told Luke that A League of Their Own is about lesbians.
Finally got around to Parasite, loves it. 🪨 Does not realize it’s about him.
The Ghost of Richard Gilmore
Surely enjoying Succession, wherever he is. 💰
And wherever you are, you can join our community of TV and movie lovers. Or argue about the validity of this listicle. Your choice!
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