"Coffee coffee coffee!" Iconic Gilmore Girls Quotes on Life, Love, and Caffeine
There’s a perfect Gilmore quote for every occasion!
Gilmore Girls is endlessly re-watchable 25 years after its premiere in part because of the fast-paced, reference-heavy dialogue. The power of the writing holds up year after year as fans quote the series as a banner of their fandom. Favorite quotes show up on Gilmore-inspired clothes, mugs, and tote bags. Fans use their favorite quotes in their art, social media profiles, and everyday speech. You could say there’s a Gilmore Girls quote for every occasion.
So that’s why we put together some of our favorite quotes for some everyday occasions! This is hardly an exhaustive list (we might have to do a Part Two sometime!) but tell us what your favorite quotes–both those we mentioned and those we may have forgotten—in the comments!
On friendship:
“I want to chime in and be supportive, but I don’t know what you’re talking about.” –Sookie
“We used to talk about living together. Remember, when we were little? It was going to be a house made of cheese.” –Rory
“I mean, I don’t know what it’s like to have a sister, but I feel like I do, you know?” –Rory
“Yeah, I’m on board. What do you need? I’ll swab the deck, I’ll hoist the sail... anything nautical.” –Sookie
“You jump, I jump, Jack.” –Rory
“It is my responsibility as your best friend to make sure you go do exciting things even when you don’t want to.” –Sookie
“Solidarity, sister.” –Lorelai
“You are full of hate and loathing, and I love it.” –Lorelai
“I should hate you, not miss you. Make me hate you!” –Rory
“Did you ever know that you’re my hero?” –Lorelai
“You’re my guidepost for everything.” –Rory
On fitness, beauty and living your best:
“Who cares if I’m pretty if I fail my finals?” –Rory
“A little nervous breakdown can work wonders for a girl.” –Rory
“It’s so satisfying to watch people exercise while you eat junk food.” –Lane
“I wanna get the healthy glow of someone who consistently goes to the gym, without having to go to the gym of course.” –Kirk
“You have to sleep, it’s what keeps you pretty.” –Lorelai
“People don’t realize it, but it takes years of training to eat the way we do.” –Lorelai
“I mean, who has three Thigh Masters, besides Suzanne Somers?” –Sookie
“So the walk from the cucumber water to here… that was what, another 20 calories?” –Lorelai
“We intend to leave here completely different people.” –Emily “Yes, I’m going to be Ted Nugent.” –Lorelai
“The run around? That does not sound good.” –Rory
“If eating cake is wrong, I don’t want to be right.” –Lorelai
“I live in two worlds. One is a world of books.” –Rory
“Nothing excites me before 11:00.” –Rory
“Mom, you’ve given me everything I need.” –Rory
“Seventy-five thousand dollars? Oh my God, that’s like 150 pairs of Jimmy Choos.” –Lorelai
“An education is the most important thing in the world, next to family.” –Emily
When you’re puzzled by the actions of others:
“WHY did you drop out of Yale?!” –Jess
“People are particularly stupid today. I can’t talk to any more of them.” –Michel
“This town is like one big outpatient mental institution.” –Christopher
“Hold on. I’m looking up ‘aneurysm’ in our medical dictionary to see if I just had one.” –Emily
“Am I crying or laughing?” –Sookie
“You’re like a pop-up book from hell.” –Rory
“I’m not cut out to deal with people.” –Paris
“I’m sorry, have I ever been mistaken for a patient person?” –Paris
“Is it raining?” –Girl at Yale “No, it’s National Baptism Day. Tie your tubes, idiot.” –Paris
“Gnome kicking says a lot about a man’s character.” –Babette
“Jerk, ass, arrogant, inconsiderate, mindless, frat boy, low life, buttface miscreant!” –Rory
“You offer nothing to women or the world in general.” –Paris
“I’ll have to bring my English-to-dumbbell dictionary.” –Emily
“Every day that you breathe, you make my life harder.” –Michel
“I don’t want to talk to anybody else. I don’t like anybody else.” –Jess
Motivational sentiments:
“I can scare the stupid out of you, but the lazy runs deep.” –Paris
“You can use your mother’s old golf clubs. They’re upstairs gathering dust, just like the rest of her potential.” –Emily
“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.” –Lorelai
“It’s ‘sing your favorite hymn night’ at the Kim house. Make a run for it.” –Lane
“I don’t like Mondays, but unfortunately, they come around eventually.” –Lorelai
“People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute. You climb up here with me, it’s one less minute you haven’t lived.” –Logan
“I want to live my life so that I’ll be able to read an in-depth biography about myself in later years and not puke.” –Paris
“Sleep when you’re dead.” –Paris
“Never underestimate the power of alliteration, my friend.” –Paris
“What she tackles, she conquers.” –Richard
“No man is an island, but this woman is.” –Paris
“Copper Boom!” –Lorelai and Rory
“I am not your mother or your hugger. If you need some love, get a hooker. If you’re having a bad day, find a ledge or a way to deal. My door is not open to you. Ever.” –Paris
“I’ve got the next two and a half hours planned, and then there’s just darkness and possibly some dragons.” –Rory
“It’s Avril Lavigne’s world, we’re just livin’ in it.” –Rory
“We’re almost there and nowhere near it. All that matters is that we’re going.” –Lorelai
“You’ve got to be patient and wait for what you want to appear, then pounce.” -Michel
“Did anyone ever think that maybe Sylvia Plath wasn’t crazy, she was just cold?” –Lorelai
Notes on love:
“I’m afraid once your heart’s involved, it all comes out in moron.” –Lorelai
“Does he have a motorcycle? ‘Cause if you’re gonna throw your life away he’d better have a motorcycle!” –Lorelai
“Every girl has to fall for a bad boy. It’s the rule. It’s the reason so many accountants eventually get married.” –Lane
“Boys don’t like funny girls.” –Mrs. Kim
“Well, I’m attracted to pie, doesn’t mean I feel the need to date pie.” –Lorelai
“I got kissed…and I shoplifted.” –Rory
“I’m afraid once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron.” –Lorelai
“It’s all any of us wants: to find a nice person to hang out with till we drop dead.” –Lorelai
“I left behind a glass slipper, and a business card, in case the prince is really dumb.” –Lorelai
“It’s like my life isn’t even real to me unless you’re there, and you’re in it, and I’m sharing it with you.” –Luke
“Every relationship is just a big honking leap of faith.” –Rory
“No men…just lots and lots of Chinese food.” –Paris
“I already wrote his name in my revenge notebook.” –Paris
“I’m so damn lonely, not even Animal Planet does it for me anymore.” –Kirk
“Cookies for the love and the Dean, and the cookies for the love and the Dean.” –Sookie
“I just want you to know that I’m in. I’m all in.” –Luke
“Miss Patty’s punch is used to clean tar off of construction sites.” –Rory “So let it clean the tar off of our souls.” –Paris
“Date. I can’t date. I’m not genetically set up for it.” –Paris
“I thought there was a better chance of all four of the Beatles getting back together than you two ever calming down long enough to get engaged.” –Taylor Doose
“Right now, I don’t need to do anything but be right here with you.” –Logan
“Think how dull your life would be without me.” –Jess
“If all else fails, you can marry rich.” –Rory
“Relationships need verbs.” –Lorelai
“At least she has a husband to kill.” –Emily
And when you just need the coffee:
This is not an herbal tea morning. This is a jumbo-coffee morning. I need coffee in an IV.” –Lorelai
“Do you like coffee?” –Max “Only with my oxygen.” –Lorelai
“Coffee, please, and a shot of cynicism.” –Lorelai
“Everything in my life has something to do with coffee. I believe in a former life I was coffee.” –Lorelai
“I can’t stop drinking the coffee. I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing, walking, and words-putting-into-sentence-doing.” –Lorelai
“This is not coffee. This is a Mocha Chocolate Caramel Swirl-a-Chino with extra whipped cream…if it was physically possible to make love to a hot beverage, this would be the one.” –Lorelai
“Nothing says coffee like six in the morning.” –Lorelai
“The sun isn’t even warm yet.” –Lorelai
“Man, I will say anything for a cup of coffee.” –Lorelai
“I need caffeine. Whatever form you’ve got. I haven’t had it all day. I’ll drink it, shoot it, eat it, snort it. Whatever form it’s in, gimme.” –Lorelai
“Coffee-coffee-coffee is a saying. Like an exaggeration. It’s a funny, desperate cry for caffeine.” –Lorelai
“I need coffee. Extra strong. Double caff. Triple caff. No, forget the caff. Throw in the whole cow.” –Lorelai
“I made it extra strong. It should blacken your teeth and rot your stomach.” –Lane
“One bag of coffee per cup of water, right?” –Christopher
“I thought you might like some coffee, since you always do.” –Lane
“Fresh coffee will be ready in a minute, unless you want to just roll up a dollar bill and go nuts.” –Luke
When things aren’t going your way:
“That’s the last time I buy something just because it’s furry.” –Lorelai
“I have now used the word “suck” so much, it’s lost all meaning to me.” –Rory
“I feel like crap on toast” –Michel
“Hate early, must kill early.” –Lorelai
“That makes me so mad and so sad. I’m smad!” –Sookie
“Yeah, I’m not feeling so good, my leg is haunted.” –Lorelai
“Reality has absolutely no place in our world.” –Lorelai
“The ship’s too big and the bottle’s too small.” –Sookie
“Well, if you expect that muffin to fly back to the kitchen by itself, you better go get it a cape.” –Emily
“I’m just being dramatic. It’s what I do.” –Lorelai
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m great. It’s a big, fat, happy sunshine day for me.” –Luke
“I cannot do this alone. I need my mommy, and I don’t care who knows it.” –Rory
“Oy with the poodles already.” –Lorelai
“Give me a burger, onion rings, and a list of people who killed their parents and got away with it. I need some heroes.” –Lorelai
“Sorry. Independence Inn. Major Disappointment speaking.” –Lorelai
“Violent pencil-tossing usually signals a need for pie.” –Luke
“I don’t like problems. I avoid them when I can and I don’t like people pointing them out to me.” –Lorelai
“This adult stuff is hard, isn’t it?” –Lane
“I’m not broken. Maybe just a little chipped.” –Lorelai
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